Linkadelica

In the spirit of the helladays, I would like to share more or less verbatim an exchange I had with a female person in the washroom of the Unique Thrift Shop at 51st & Kedzie on Saturday December 20.  To set this up I will first disclose that I have a mild case of a bashful kidney and hence prefer not to engage in conversation while I’m taking care of personal business.  It’s not that I don’t want to, although I suppose if I had to be honest I really don’t.  To look at it from a different angle, I’m there for a reason and talking isn’t it.  If that makes me antisocial, then so be it.  I just feel there should be certain times a lady should have the privilege of remaining silent.

ME: (Enters washroom, sees regular stall occupied, heads toward handicapped stall).

WOMAN IN STALL: (Something unintelligible).

ME: Pardon me, ma’am?

WOMAN IN STALL: I asked you, did the weather turn bad out there yet?

ME: Ma’m I don’t want to have a conversation!

WOMAN IN STALL: What did you say?

ME: I said, I DON’T want to TALK!

WOMAN IN STALL: Well, I never said you did!

ME: (Silence).

WOMAN IN STALL: (Unintelligible).

ME: (Silence).

I’m congested from a cold, late getting to Peoria for Christmas, behind in several projects, and, yes, things could be worse.  As soon as all this holiday nonsense is over, I promise I’ll have stuff to talk about.  I swear, I don’t even know how much I weigh and I don’t want to know.  Thanks to everyone who tuned in here this year; my only regret is that I don’t have more time and energy to post.